

| R U A TV Writer? Take this Test true or false 1. I loved school, especially homework. The pressure of always having an assignment/ term paper/doctoral dissertation due makes me have an orgasm whether I want one or not. 2. I love staying indoors writing at my computer on July 4th while everyone else is having fun in the sun, swimming, and barbecuing. 3. I love being rewritten, especially when they perform a joke-ectomy on my hilarious script and then tell me it’s not funny. Hahaha. 4. I want to be a staff writer so I can help them gang bang and wreck my perfect script. 5. Sleep and home cooked meals are for pussies and girlie men. I’d rather work than sleep any night. It's my dream to eat cold take-out from styrafoam boxes. 6. I love fatigue, especially dozing off on the 405 at 4 AM and waking up just before my car hits the guardrail. That’s my kind of thrill! 7. Nothing rattles me. Sexual jokes at my expense totally crack me up! I love it. 8. I love that people think I’m joking when I say “I have no life.” 9. I like being overpaid and spending my work day sitting around a table making jokes and laughing with the six funniest people I have ever met in my entire life. IF YOU ANSWERED TRUE TO QUESTIONS 1-9 then hurry up and finish your two hilarious spec scripts already and get a staff job ASAP. IF YOU ANSWERED FALSE TO QUESTIONS 1-8 AND TRUE TO QUESTION 9, then keep your day job (if you have one) and get some therapy as soon as you can afford it. |
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